I think my mother is mental

The Legend took seven week old Piglet round to my mother’s the other day. She’d knitted the child a teddy bear and it seemed the polite thing to do. What followed was terrifying in a “Hand that Rocks the Cradle” sort of way. The child had to be forcibly removed from my mother’s arms after about an hour of the most disturbing baby talk anyone has ever heard.

Mother – you are getting NO grandchildren from me!!!

That is all.

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